Friday, March 14, 2008

Wedding scam will be `fixed'

Panicked Canadian couples who fear they fell for a wedding scam in the Dominican Republic can breathe a sigh of relief.

The country's government announced yesterday it will fix the problem by issuing marriage certificates for those weddings whose validity was in doubt because they were performed by a fake judge.

"People should relax and be patient," said Joseline Pujol, in charge of consular affairs at the Dominican Republic embassy in Ottawa.

"Where there are some irregularities, they (the Central Electoral Board) are going to fix it. We don't want to cover this up. We are rectifying this. We want to make sure all couples going to the Dominican Republic are legally married."

The Central Electoral Board, which oversees civil weddings, says the scam was confined to one Punta Cana resort and involved a wedding co-ordinator colluding with a fake judge to swindle about 200 Canadian and British couples who had tied the knot there since last July.

Because the marriages were performed in good faith, the board will have a real judge validate them and issue certificates within three months, said Pujol.

"It's the first time this has happened. It can happen anywhere in the world. There are good and bad people everywhere."

She declined to name the hotel involved, but said the problem is not widespread, given that as many as 7,000 Canadians marry or renew their vows in the Dominican Republic every year.

The embassy was bombarded by calls from anxious couples yesterday, some of whom had received marriage certificates but were worried about their authenticity.

"They're overreacting. Ninety-nine per cent of the weddings are good. When they already have the marriage licence they have nothing to worry about. It's valid," Pujol said.

Angela Scala of Oakville was planning to hold another wedding here if the one she and husband John Sinopoli had in the Dominican Republic in December turned out to be invalid.

"Wow, what a relief," Scala said after hearing that she will be receiving a marriage certificate.

"But in some ways, it feels like I was taken for a fool. Deep down you wonder if your wedding was part of the scam. I still can't get over it."

Other couples, like Andrea and Rob Caswell of Brampton, were not worried at all though they also wed in Punta Cana, last month. On the advice of her travel agent and a wedding co-ordinator here, Caswell had their marriage legally registered in Ontario – by paying an officiant a $100 fee during a meeting at Tim Hortons – before going to the Dominican Republic.

The couple had a symbolic ceremony in Punta Cana with 25 people. "It was for the memories, but we were smart, we did our paperwork here first," Andrea said.

Wedding planners in Toronto agreed that getting legally married here before jetting off to an exotic destination is the safest and most stress-free option.

But Tara Soloway of Luxe Destination Weddings has met with resistance when she suggests that idea. "I've had some brides who said they won't do it because they feel they're lying to their guests. Nobody would really know the difference, but it's a personal choice."

The wedding fraud is big news in the Dominican Republic, said Magnolia Crisostomo, a wedding co-ordinator for Rui Hotels in Punta Cana. "Everybody's talking about it."

Donald Baker, a Toronto family lawyer, said he had never come across a scam like it. "It's really quite shocking," he said.

But even if couples didn't receive marriage certificates from the Dominican Republic, they would still have legal rights in Ontario.

"If you entered into a marriage with the best of intentions, without any reason to think it wouldn't be valid, then you're considered to be a spouse under the Family Law Act. It doesn't make you legally married, but it gives you the same rights that you would have as a married spouse under that act, which could be property and spousal support and so forth," Baker said.

Nevertheless, the union is not recognized under the Divorce Act, he added. "They're just not legally married so they would never have to get legally divorced. So actually they'd save some money, which is not a bad thing."


http://www.thestar.com/News/GTA/article/305155

Tips for parents at destination weddings

Brides and grooms who invite kids to faraway weddings must consider everything from properly addressing invitations to bedtimes to custody issues

As the bride and groom turned toward each other to say their vows, the ocean sparkled in the background and white sand warmed the guests' feet. The moment was interrupted only by a toddler - mine - yelling, "I want to sit in Mommy's lap!"

I scooped him up, only to knock the pacifier out of my 2-month-old's mouth. Her lips quivered, preparing for a full-blown wail. I popped it back in just in time.

Double meltdown averted. Still, the ceremony was a harrowing half hour for me.

Bringing the kids along to "destination weddings" - those that require travel to exotic locales - has become a priority and a challenge for many bridal couples and their guests.

"If you're asking guests to travel and including children, you have to be doing some research ahead of time," says Jeanne Hamilton, author of "Wedding Etiquette Hell" (St. Martin's Press, 2005). "The bride's responsibility is making sure guests are comfortable. If you're including kids, then you should ensure the experience for kids is just as pleasurable as it is for adults."

As for parents, it's up to them to make sure kids behave.

It can add up to one sticky situation - in some cases, quite literally, says Hamilton, who more than once has seen the frosting get licked off the cake before it's served.

Whether to invite kids is completely up to the bride and groom, she says.

Stephanie Clarke, a wedding planner at the resort we stayed at, the Sheraton Grand Bahama Island Our Lucaya, recommends going for the full-family affair if the location calls for it.

"It's an island atmosphere with sand, sun and sea, and it's not just about the wedding," she says. "It's about relaxation and fun for the kids too."

Many guests with kids might just R.S.V.P. "no" to a far-off wedding because of expensive or complicated travel arrangements. Amy Swedberg and Michael Hagen of Minneapolis found that many of their invitees - including Swedberg's sister - couldn't attend their wedding in the Bahamas.

"I'm going to be 37, and all my friends had babies recently," Swedberg says. "Three years ago, it would have been one big party."

The couple is planning a reception at home to accommodate friends - kids included - who can't make the trip.


http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/